WHAT IS BEFRIENDER MINISTRY?
BeFriender Ministry is a lay pastoral care program. That means specially trained lay persons enter into caring relationships with others at times of special need by visiting with them, being with them -- bringing emotional and spiritual support.
HOW DOES A BEFRIENDER DO THIS?
BeFrienders accept people as they are without telling them how they ought to be, listen with compassion without giving advice, allow others to make their own decisions without trying to decide for them.
HOW MUCH COUNSELING IS INVOLVED IN BEFRIENDING?
There is no counseling or advice-giving in BeFriending. The idea is to be a listening presence to those who are BeFriended.
HOW DEEP IS THE BEFRIENDER RESPONSIBILITY?
BeFrienders are there to listen, not to solve problems or impose solutions. BeFrienders also discern, with the person they visit, whether referrals to appropriate professionals are needed.
WHAT IS A BEFRIENDER'S COMMITMENT?
A BeFriender candidate initially agrees to training, a short internship and an evaluation, with the BeFriender coordinator, of whether to become a BeFriender minister.
WHAT KIND OF TRAINING DOES A BEFRIENDER RECEIVE?
The training develops communication skills, faith sharing and ministry reflection. It also addresses issues such as grief and loss, spirituality, aging, listening and confidentiality. Training is typically covered in 35 hours.
WHAT CAN A BEFRIENDER OFFER THAT GOES BEYOND FRIENDSHIP?
Being a friend comes naturally. However, skills such as listening and giving feedback in a respectful manner often need strengthening. Thus, BeFriender Ministry training develops and gives direction to gifts and qualities the person already possesses.
IS CONFIDENTIALITY AN ISSUE
Yes. BeFrienders maintain a strict policy of confidentiality. We respect the privacy of all who are BeFriended.
WHAT ARE THE OPPORTUNITIES FOR GROWTH FROM THE BEFRIENDER PROGRAM?
BeFrienders learn to appreciate both the commonality and individuality among people. We gain a deeper respect for others and an awareness that we are called to be present to each other, not only in BeFriender Ministry, but in all parts of our lives. Our challenge is to share our gifts and receive our community's gifts.
HOW CAN I GROW SPIRITUALLY FROM THE BEFRIENDER PROGRAM AND THE BEFRIENDED?
BeFrienders often gain a deeper understanding of unity in Christ by appreciating the value of each member of our community. We learn how Christ calls us to be together in our joy and our pain.
"The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing, and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is the friend who cares."
Henri Houwen
Out of Solitude
Bring or mail this form to:
Pastoral Care Ministry Coordinator
8275 Meadowbridge Road
Mechanicsville, VS 23116
Phone: (804) 746-4911
Name
Phone
Address
Please indicate your areas of interest:
| c | I would like information about the next BeFriender Ministry training program. |
| c | I would like to have a BeFriender Minister visit me. |
| c | I would like to suggest a BeFriender Minster call on: |
Some questions you may have about BeFriender Ministry are:
lf my family member has a BeFriender visiting, does that mean l am not meeting their needs?
Not at all. A BeFriender cannot take the place of family or friends in someone's life. For many though, a BeFriender is a supportive visitor beyond the family.
How Often will a BeFriender visit?
The frequency of visits will be determined by the people who are visited and the BeFriender. A visit usually takes place every week or two and lasts about an hour.
What if I cannot think of anything to say?
The BeFriender does not come to you to gain information. Rather, he or she will listen and respond, trying to support you at this time in your life -- without giving advice or making judgments.
BeFriender Ministry is not so much a "doing", but rather "being," -- a ministry of presence, of quiet listening.
BeFriender Ministry at Redeemer began in February, 1995. BeFriender coordinators enable BeFrienders to respond to the emotional and spiritual needs of persons in our community. Following are some of the training topics:
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Church
of the
Redeemer
8275 Meadowbridge Road
Mechanicsville, Virginia 23116
(804) 746-4911